I write this post with a heavy heart. A heavy mommy heart. My toddler started creche this year and it hasn’t gone well. He is new to school/daycare but I still expected this to go alot better than it did.
Cole is two years old. He is smart, active and a very alert little boy. He is shy around people he doesn’t know. Except for tantrums though. If push comes to shove, he will throw that tantrum around any stranger. I’m sure most toddler moms can relate though.
He was home all day during the the week, so he was always delighted when he seeing other little people his size. There is a big age gap between him and his brother, so while he enjoys the company, its not exactly the same as socializing with someone his own size and that he can relate to.
He also lacks stimulation to some extent because of being at home all day. He isn’t necessarily being stimulated to the degree that he needs right now in this season of his life. So we decided that we’ll send him to a daycare/creche.
My toddler started creche this year and it hasn’t gone well
I was so excited for him to start spending some time with other little people his age. I looked forward to seeing the joy and satisfaction on his face. But it didn’t go as expected. My toddler started creche this year and it hasn’t gone well.
On day 1 the drop off was fine. He unfortunately didn’t get to see me leave and I think that may have also played a big role in his unhappiness. He started crying as soon as he realized we had left. The crying continued until he was fetched at 14h30.
The next day I made sure he saw me leave and that I was happy to leave him in that environment. I feel it is important for him to believe that I trust the people I am leaving him with. But alas, he cried and cried some more.
He’s being alot at home too and overall seems rather anxious. It’s understandable though. He is all of a sudden being left in this environment of strangers without any clue of when and IF he would see us again. Lets not forget about learning how to adapt to following a routine.
When I thought about it from that perspective, it helped me cope a little with my difficult, anxious toddler. The exhaustion still remains with me though. We are not getting any good sleep as our nights are filled with many many wake-ups. And the anxiety of it all tires me tremendously. I mean how can I, as a mom, be happy knowing that my baby isn’t happy?
Time makes everything better
Cole is having a tough time adjusting. There are moments where he is back to his happy cheerful self but its those times where he’s not that bothers me.
I believe he will adjust with time though. Infact, as much as I expected him to just fall into it all and adapt, I knew there is the small chance that it won’t go well. Because all children are different. No one person adapts to any given situation in the same way that the next person does. So why should I expect my toddler to adapt as quickly as the next?
So after much deliberation, we decided to shorten his day and increase the time by an hour each new week. Its been two weeks since he started creche. I’ve been communicating with the school quite often and they’ve been giving me the same feedback everytime. He is either teary or hasn’t settled and will not mingle with the rest of the kids.
We just need time. We need to do is wait it out. In time he will be happy. But these past two weeks have been the longest two weeks of my life. I know that I shouldn’t let it get me down because he will eventually adjust, but alas, here I am, typing this out with a heavy heart.
I am a mom afterall
It’s called being a mom. I am sad when my kids are sad. I am worried when my kids are anxious. When they are afraid, I am too. But in front of all of these emotions, I wear my face of bravery so that they know it will all be ok and so they can safely make it over their hurdle.
I need to remind myself too, that it’s going to be ok. So I’ll wait it out and give him time to settle. I’ll wear my face of bravery on the outside and on the inside. I’ll come back to this post a few weeks down the line and feel completely silly and embarrassed for feeling the way I’m feeling now. Or I might just laugh it off.
Are there any moms out there who been through this and made it out strong?
Tata for now,
No title. Just a day in the life of us..
📍 Cape Town